Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
