I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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