does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Enjoy the penises
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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