He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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