I'm drive I can fine osifer
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
