my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Randomize
