508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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