The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
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