Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
a search helicopter?!
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
