Nicole vs. Life
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
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