so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
