He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
