Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
