So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
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He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
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So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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