do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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