I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
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Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
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It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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