you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
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