i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
