the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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