That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
