it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize