Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize