So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
