Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize