ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
North Korea, Best Korea!
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Randomize
