I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
