She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
