'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
