sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
