can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Randomize
