I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
even my farts smell like vagina
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
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i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
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critical mistake not lubing the nipples
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.