C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
is wine microwaveable?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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