I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize