you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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