No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
