She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My ATM looks so different sober.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
