Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
People with herpes should wear stickers.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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