I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
