"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
