Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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