plz talk dirty to me
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Randomize
