Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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