I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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