You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize