Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
