Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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