I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
