WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
