Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
