Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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