how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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