Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
