This girl is more easily done than said...
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Panties = found
Randomize
