is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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