is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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